Empyreal Environs

Game 56: June 6, 2006
Red Sox (33-23), 1
Yankees (35-22), 2
L: David Pauley (0-1)
W: Chien-Ming Wang (6-2)
H: Kyle Farnsworth (8)
S: Mariano Rivera (12)

Dear David,

Your mother and I just watched the terrific game you pitched against the Yankees. It was really incredible, son. We’re both so proud of you. It’s hard to find the words.

You struck out Slappy Rodriguez in the second and you had a key whiff of that Phillips kid in the fourth with Passedballa on third. Hey, I just looked up Phillips and he’s almost 30!

Speaking of old, don’t feel too bad about Williams hitting that homer off of you in the fifth. You probably don’t remember this since you’re so young, but he was a good player in his prime, which was about 25 years ago. By the way, that curtain call nonsense is ridiculous.

I can’t believe the score was so close! Your team had a lot of chances to score more runs but just didn’t capitalize. If any of them aren’t playing hard behind you because they don’t have faith in me, you just let me know and I’ll be on the first plane there. I’ve got a few words for Rudy Seanez, too, ultimate fighter or no.

Not only did you perform well on the field, but you spoke well and with poise at your postgame interview.

Just be patient, son. Your day will come.
Dad

P.S. from Mom: Davey, you look so thin! Are you eating enough? Did you get the cookies I sent? You could use a haircut, too. I mean, it doesn’t have to be Yankee short, but your sideburns are a little long. Is that something that Jonathan Papelbon told you to do? I like his pitching and all, but his hair...! And what did I tell you about leaving pitches up in the zone against power hitters? Much love, Mom

Dear Mom and Dad,

It’s not Rudy’s fault at all that he walked in the winning run in the seventh. I’ve been kinda beating myself up about not fielding that grounder to me by Cairo. I couldn’t get my glove on it and Lowrider tried to barehand it. All the guys are telling me not to sweat it, but I won’t shirk my responsibility for the loss. I got two outs easily that inning and I didn’t close it out.

Did you see Papi’s homer in the third? After he rounded the bases and came back in the dugout I congratulated him. He calls me “Cookie Monster” and he really loves the oatmeal chocolate chips you make, Mom. Can you send some more? He calls them his energy bars!

Dad, I find it hard to believe Williams was ever any good. Did you see him kicking around the ball Lowell hit to him in the seventh. I’ve seen Sea Dogs bench players field better than that.

Lowell is a great leader for our team. He took some time to come see how I was doing during Josh’s outing last night. He’s sorta obsessed about the hidden ball trick and was trying to convince me to do it at some point during the game. Coach Mills kept on coming by and saying, “Stop trying to do that damn trick play, Lowell! Kid’s got enough on his mind as it is.” Which was very true; I watched hours of video on the Yankees. All that preparation almost paid off with a win.

If only Manny got that ball out of the park. I thought for sure his fly ball in the eighth was gone. That Melky guy got sent all the way down to Double-A after making a pretty bad showing last year in the majors. He’s really come around, though. But not so much he should be making curtain calls. That stuff really annoys me.

Anyway, we’ll see how things go. Boomer may not ever pitch again. And now that MmmBop has been called up, guess who doesn’t have to carry the pink backpack any more? Technically, it should still be me, but Paps and me are making up some arbitrary rule so that Hansen will have to.

Love,
Your Son David